The definitive manual for eating, drinking, and fondling food from the James Beard Award-winning Twitter sensation, Ruth Bourdain. Twitter sensation and culinary mash-up Ruth Bourdain, winner of the 2011 James Beard Foundation Award for Humor, is your personal guide on this culinary adventure, sharing a wealth of knowledge acquired through years in restaurant kitchens, experimentation with food porn, smoking tangerine zest, and an unfortunate incident involving a durian. Along the way, Comfort Me with Offal features vivid and fascinating personal stories from Ruth Bourdain’s extraordinary life in food, including appearances from many of the world’s most renowned chefs. Not since Jean Anthelme Brillat-Savarin’s landmark The Physiology of Taste has there been a more comprehensive guide to the world of food and wine. From food history to dining etiquette to matters of taste, this practical handbook offers the basics for navigating every aspect of gastronomy, including: · • A food timeline, from the dawn of man to the modern era · • The importance of celebrity chef hairstyles · • Achieving the orgasmic potential of chocolate · • Culinary pick-up lines · • The twenty types of offal you need to eat before you die · • Becoming a “master baster” on Thanksgiving · • A field guide to the modern foodie, from carniwhores to gastrosexuals · • Essential exercises for bulking up your taste buds · • Tips for raising a baby gastronome · • How to prepare for a vegan apocalypse · • And so much more . . . Praise for Ruth Bourdain online: “It is kind of genius. I love it. I’m a total addict. I’m hooked already and, frankly, flattered and disturbed in equal measure.” —Anthony Bourdain, author and host, No Reservations “I normally read him religiously. And I find him hilarious.” —Ruth Reichl, author, former editor-in-chief, Gourmet “A shining star out there in [the] twitterverse.” —Tom Colicchio, chef and host, Top Chef “Truly a scary creation.” —Michael Ruhlman, author