The legion of dental phobics - and others whose whine raises in tandem with that of the drill - would do well to stifle their terror and instead offer thanks to Apollonia, the patron saint of toothache sufferers, that they only face fleeting discomfort rather than the disfiguring distress or slow agonizing death by the dental care providers of the past. The transition from yesterday"s ignorance, misapprehension and superstition to the enlightened and nerve-deadened protocols of today has been a slow and painful process. This text contains, among many thing, the following facts: among toothache remedies favoured by Pierre Fauchard was rinsing the mouth liberally with one"s own urine; George Washington never had wooden teeth - however his chronic dental problem may have impacted the outcome of the American Revolution; and soldiers in the Civil War needed at least two opposing front teeth to rip open powder envelopes, so some men called up for induction had their front teeth extracted to avoid service.